Just 'Cause That Disney Song Was Right All Along

Hello world! How’s it been? It’s been a long time since my last post and an even longer time since I had a post which does not have anything to do with links of YouTube videos. Haha.

I admit I’ve been a bit lazy when it comes to writing. Also while I was in Davao, I couldn’t concentrate on writing ‘cause babysitting would always stand in the way. But now that I’m in Manila, I have all the time for writing, for thinking and for myself.  

It’s 8:46pm, gloomy Tuesday night. I’m in my bedroom at the 15^th floor of a 30-something story building. Looking out my window, all I see are tall buildings acting as both figure and ground in the vast Ortigas landscape (CHOS).

Here, take a look:

View of what's outside my window

view of what's below my window

 

 I see clear skies with no stars in sight. Also, pollution isn’t that visible at night and that makes me happy. I can hear the cars and buses honk as they speed through Ortigas Avenue. 

It’s pretty much the urban life out there- something immensely different from what I’ve lived in my two-month stay in Davao. Hello adjustment and acceptance to CHANGE! Haha. Once again, I come face to face with the only thing that’s permanent in this world. Hopefully, my relationship with Mr. C has improved since I’ve had him in numerous occasions in the past. As a matter of fact, I feel more confident facing him now. Sign of maturity, I guess?

My bedroom now used to be my sister’s before she went to Quatar. It makes me miss her a bit, considering the fact that this used to be the place where we’d talk about anything random, from comical nonsense to boys we love to hate. Nonetheless, I’m happy for her ‘cause her hard work finally paid off, plus she found the love of her life and it seems like she’s having fun there. Having said that, I wish this room also brings me luck…and love. Hahaha.   

Now, enough of the present, let’s talk about the past! Well, the recent past, that is. December, December. You’re a month to remember! Haha. Not only because it’s the Christmas month but because a lot of unexpected events happened this month, events which had something to do with my past, influenced my present and might affect my future. Best way to end the year, eh? So let me start sharing whilst the night is young:

 “It’s a small world after all.”

WTH.- these three letters were all I could think of when I found out about it. WHAT. THE. HELL. Just that. Okay, so here’s what happened. It was the annual Christmas party of my so called “clique” (which for me means, people who are not family that you can’t live without).

We were having a blast when one of my almost drunk guy friends suddenly blurted out:

“Hey, I know something about you!”

I thought it was another one of his jokes but hell no. It was something I did not expect. After so much blabbing, the entirety of his message was this:

“I met a stranger in a car show; he was from Cebu and turns out he was your ex and he shared something about the two of you!”

Great. Just great. How the hell did this overpopulated country get so small? Out of thousands of people in Davao, why the hell did my ex-boyfriend get acquainted with one of the members of my clique? And worse, he said things which were supposed to be between the two of us ONLY. And much much much worst, to add insult to injury, that friend of mine was a complete stranger to him.

I know the break up was bad but seriously? You’d share those things to a stranger you just met at a car show?! Are you that tactless? Or are you just plain immature?

I swear that If I had super powers to turn back time, I’d relive the moment when my friend blurted it out and I’d place packaging tape in his mouth just to shut him up.

I admit I was hurt. How could the only guy in Cebu which I had a “real” relationship with (or so I thought) do this to me? Why did the one Cebuano whom I thought could be mature enough to respect our past do this to meeeee?

Why?

WHY???

Do you always do this to me?

Whyyy?

Couldn’t you just see it through me?

How come, you act like this like you just don’t care at all?

Do you expect me to believe I was the only one who’d fall?

I can feel, I can feel you near me.

Even though you’re far away.

 I can feel, I can feel you baby.

 WHYYYY?

By Avril Lavigne. Hahaha.

Whatever his reason was, it was not reasonable enough. 

After the party, all I could think of was what just transpired. Thoughts of the past I’ve been trying to forget came running through my mind. Memories of my mistakes felt fresh- the guilt, the sadness and the regrets. It made me realize something important- that no matter how hard we try to run away from the past, it will always, ALWAYS haunt us. Why? One word- CONSEQUENCE.  

These are the consequences of my actions. Physics would tell you that in every action there is always a reaction. This, dear self, is one of the few reactions of your past actions.

The next day, I was on Facebook and Mr. I’m-Gonna-Tell-Everyone-About-Us-Even-Strangers was online and I wanted to confront him about it. Or at least message him two letters that would perfectly summarize how I felt: FU!!!

But, the angel in me won.  I opted not to do it. It wouldn’t change anything. Right? What good would that do? What’s done is done. Maybe I also had my own share of faults; I couldn’t blame it all on him.

As much as I would like to, life is not like MS-Word, it doesn’t have an UNDO button. So no matter how hard I try to rationalize things the bottom line is this- I can’t rewrite the past. 

However, being the optimistic person that I am, I decided to be positive about it. I’m using these consequences to my advantage. Instead of drowning myself with regrets and become a victim of the “what-might-have-been” phenomena, I’d rather learn from it.

I admit I was young, immature and in love back then and stupid decision-making was one of the things I was good at. And so, part of the blame should go to my underdeveloped pre-frontal cortex. Although it’s supposed to be fully developed at age 12, I’ve always been a late bloomer. haha

Since I can’t change the past, all I can do is extract as much wisdom from my mistakes. It’s the key to make better choices now and in the future. One of those important lessons is to avoid douche bags at all times! And of course, to be wiser in whatever I do. I have also learned to listen to that little voice inside of me, the one that tells you to use Safeguard instead of the other soap brand, the one Oprah keeps telling her audience to listen to when in doubt, the one that the Bible tells us to keep clean and clear.  

All these important lessons are useless unless I put them out there. And that’s the biggest challenge- to transform wisdom into action. The unforgettable Christmas doesn't end here, Imma post something more next time. But I need to go now 'cause my effin Smart Bro's almost out of credits. So, before I end this entry, let me raise my glass to the past while singing this very meaningful song:

Just 'Cause I Used To Avoid An Ex-Beau on Facebook

While browsing for Sarah Bareilles' King of Anything, I ran into this song. It's by an awesome singer/songwriter from Australia (saying that with an Aussie accent), Kate Miller-Heidke
The lyrics are totally hilarious!! Feel free to sing along! :)

They say everyone should have their heart broken at least once
And that is how you grow emotionally
Well I have been misused by many, many, many men
But nothing can compare to how you treated me.

At times it really felt as though the pain was here to stay
And though it’s many years I go I feel it to this day,
And now you wanna be my friend on Facebook
Are you fucking kidding me?

All the memories are flooding back to me now
All the ways you stole the light from my eyes
I travelled so far just to get away from you
‘Til this morning’s friend request surprise!

At times it really felt as though I’d never smile again
You narcissistic arsehole, oh you nasty nasty man
And now you wanna be my friend on Facebook
Are you fucking kidding…?

I don’t care what kind of cocktail you are,
Or which member of The Beatles or which 1950s movie star
I don’t give a toss if you’re a ninja or a pirate
I suspect you’d be a pirate, but I don’t wanna verify it
And I don’t give a shit what your stripper name is
Or if your kitty had a litter
Look -- Just follow me on Twitter
I don’t care about your family tree
And I certainly don’t want you poking me…
again.

And now you wanna be my friend on Facebook
Oh you fucking, fucking fuck…

Click IGNORE. 

Just 'Cause OPM Makes Me Proud To Be Pinoy

No’s such a powerful word 

were not capable of saying tonight

- Grab (Orange Cartel)

*I think Orange Cartel did a good job on the bass line.  

********

You made a hole on my earth, I kneel to check how deep.

In vain I start to fall, but when I know its you who dug it, do I need to care whats in?

- Billy I Can't Sleep Tonight (Orange Cartel)

**********

Hold on to what we've got

& I'll bleed to make it last

- Paperskin (Jejaview)

* I swear "Jejemon" was the first thing that came to mind when I saw the band name. :))

**********

Just 'Cause I Think Fuego + Tricia Gosingtian Look Cute Together

...and Mong Alcaraz + ME look cuter. hahaha

Just 'Cause God Loves Calories That He Made So Many

Aloha mi amigas y amigos! Feeling multi-lingual? haha. Before I start blabbing here, I want to share a very meaningful quote about exercise (just 'cause I was classically conditioned by my fifth grade English teacher that the best way to write an introduction is either through an anecdote, a question or a quote.) So here goes nothing Ms.I-forgot-her-name-but-she's-my-adviser-way-back-Grade-5:

"I don't care about being big and strong, I just want to look good naked" 

- Anonymous

Anonymous pa daw. haha. I can't blame him/her. 'Cause if I were to shout that to world, I would also prefer anonymity, shy ako eh. :)) But hey! That's the most honest reason why people go to the gym! haha. Well, except for a few exceptions who exercise due to health reasons or out of habitual practice (?). But if I were to survey the majority, I think most people simply exercise out of vanity- just so that they'll look good (naked or not naked).

Sadly (or happily?), I'm one of those people. Teehee. BUT, I'm also one of those who want to maintain good health and persistently try be fit - which is why today I started my...(*drum roll*)

Consistent Exercise Program!! 

(* loud, fake-sounding applause*)

Why did I call it such? Because it’s a consistent, exercise, program. DUH. Haha.

I’m planning to have this as an early New Year’s Resolution because I recently (by that I mean just now while I’m typing this) formulated this theory that if you set your New Year’s Resolution weeks before the New Year, you end up accomplishing them! Isn’t that the best theory ever? Haha. 

 Two or three weeks ago, I thought of exercising but the problem was...I only thought of it- I didn't actually do it. :p

 So now, I pushed myself to put on those leggings and rubber shoes! Plus, I had the motivation 'cause I felt really guilty when I ate that sinful chocolate cake for breakfast with all the semi-sweet chocolate icing, topped with miniature milk chocolate Hershey's kisses. I swear I'd go to hell after eating that.

Anyway, I stayed on the treadmill for approximately 20 minutes. HEHEHE. I started and ended DAY 1 of my CEP with a few stretching exercises:

P.S. I faked the face 'cause I wanted to channel that even simple stretches like these hurt so much already. Can you spell BUM?

I tried doing some yoga-ish stretching too! Since I look at yoga as something that connects one to nature,  I tried to replicate a hill. haha

This is my favorite stretching pose because I love the pain I feel in my hamstrings (yes, I'm a masochist)

I wasn't contented with my stretching exercises so I decided to Google and look for something better. I found this one as the most suitable for beginners like me:

Imma try this next time!

There are no complicated rules to my CEP, you just need to have at least an hour of exercise a day and a healthy diet. Isn't that awesome? And isn't it obvious that it's creator is too lazy to think of any other rules? hahaha.

But swear, I have a good feeling about this because just like any other exercise program, the important factor is to consistently stick with it. Consistency- that's the key! See? It rhymes! haha.

Plus, consistency and perseverance are areas in my life that I need to work hard on. Thus, it's like hitting two birds with one stone, I'll improve not just physically but psychologically as well. Yehey. HAHA.

Since I started this entry with a quote, I might as well end it the same way:

 "Too many people confine their exercise to jumping to conclusions, running off at the mouth, stretching the truth, bending over backwards, lying down on the job, side stepping responsibility, swimming against the current and pushing their luck." 

HAHA. True, eh?


KThnxBye,

GY :) 

Just A Neil Gaiman Wisdom I Stumbled Upon

Just A Kickass Song I Heard From Gossip Girl

I'm coming home
I'm coming home 

Tell the world I'm coming home
Let the rain wash away all the pain of yesterday
I know my kingdom awaits and they've forgiven my mistakes
I'm coming home.

  

Just finished watching another terrific episode of Gossip Girl!! They played this song in the end part. I love the lyrics. So meaningful. 

"I'm coming home, I'm coming home..Let the rain wash away all the pain of yesterday.." 

Dude, I am home but I wonder why this song still hits me hard. REAL HARD. I guess I'm missing my other home- the one where I had "all the pain of yesterday". CHOS. haha. 

Seriously though, I miss Cebu. I really really do. 

Don't get me wrong, I love Davao 'cause my family, especially Mattea, and my long time friends are here. Plus life here is so much easier, breezier and comfortable-er here than anywhere else.

But there's something about Cebu that makes me miss it once in a while. I'm pretty sure it's not the weather nor the dirty water in my apartment. I guess it's the people I've met? (and yes, that includes the douchebags)

Or maybe because four years of living there made me see the other side of life- the one I wasn't used to, the one I always thought I'd hate but eventually learned to love. 

Oh Cebu, you and your charms. But worry not for just as McArthur exclaimed, "I SHALL RETURN!!" 

And just as this song keeps reiterating.."I'm coming home." (at least not for now, but soon!) :) 

KThnxBye,

GY :)

 

Just 'Cause I'm Geli Tearjerky (UPDATED)

Eraserheads! A random song I found in my lappy. Definitely one of the songs that give you a good feeling inside. Click the triangle if you want some Tearjerky!!

Julie Tearjerky on the phone.
She says that I can't be alone.
Yeah she was told that time was gold.
Super strategy guide.

P.S. I just learned how to add a video through embed. HAHA. Sorry na. :)) 

***** UPDATE STARTS HERE****

Hey ya! Ever since I posted this, I can't help but listen to Eraserheads! Every time I turn on the computer, it's like my fingers automatically lead the cursor to the folder where my OPM songs are located, click on all the Eheads songs and drag 'em in my music player. In short, my fingers have brains now! And their brains love the young Ely Buendia and Raymund Marasigan!

Anyway, since I can't get enough of them, I decided to update this entry by making a compilation of their most celebrated tracks! So lo and behold  My Top Seven Most Wanted Eraserheads Songs of All Time, Now, Forever and Ever Amen.

So sit back, relax and have some ultraelectromagneticpop. :)

P.S. Most of the videos are from their reunion concert, The Final Set. 

Top 7

Take a bite
It's alright
A little lovin and some fruit to bake
Life is a piece of cake

- Fruitcake (1996)

* Just had to include this not only because it's almost Christmas but this came from their only concept album which was also entitled Fruitcake. No Tagalog word was used in the entire album and it was also the longest in terms of duration, lasting 73 minutes.  

Top 6

Ang daming bawal sa mundo
Sinasakal nila tayo
Buksan ang puso at isipan
Paliparin ang kamalayan

- Alapaap (Anthology, 2004)

 

Top 5

In a world where everybody

Hates a happy ending story

It's a wonder love can make the world go round

- With A Smile (1994)

* Trivia: This was their very first music video.

 Top 4

Masakit mang isipin
Kailangang tanggapin

Kung kelan ka naging seryoso

Saka ka niya gagaguhin

- Pare Ko (1993)

* Rumor has it that the song became popular because of its obscenities ( e.g. "tang ina"), which were rarely used in OPM songs back then. Nonetheless, it became their very first hit single which was later on adapted into a movie with the same title starring Claudine Barreto and Mark Anthony Fernandez (why the hell am I telling you this? haha)

* I loved how Ely Buendia changed the lyrics to "Yun pala magaling na siya sa kama, akala ko ay dehins pa" in this video. haha. Nice one, Ely.

Top 3

Makapangyarihan ang pag-ibig
Na hawak mo sa iyong kamay
Ikaw ang Diyos at hari ng iyong mundo
Matakot sila sa 'yo

- Huwag Kang Matakot (Anthology, 2004)

Top 2

Magkahawak ang ating kamay
At walang kamalaymalay
Na tinuruan mo ang puso ko
Na umibig ng tunay

- Ang Huling El Bimbo (1995)

* Ever wondered who Paraluman is? Sigrid Sophia Agatha von Giese in real life, she was a popular Filipino movie actress back in the 1940's. Click here to see if  "Kamukha mo si Paraluman".

Top 1

Wag ka sanang magtanong at magduda
Dahil ang puso ko'y walang pangamba
Lahat tayo'y mabubuhay na tahimika't buong ligaya

- Ligaya (1993)

* Okay, I may be biased on this one since it's is my all time favorite. I even call my alter ego Ligaya- inspired by the movie, "Ligaya Ang Itawag Mo Sa Akin" starring Rosanna Roces. LOL. (okay, talking nonsense again.)

 

The Eraserheads, paving the way for future OPM bands in the alternative rock scene, have definitely gone beyond their title as "The Beatles of the Philippines". Having said that, it is recognized that Eleandre Basiño Buendia will forever be the most awesome Pinoy front man of all time. 

Nuff said. :)

KThnxBye,

GY :)

Just 'Cause Hating is the Sincerest Form of Flattery.

Okay. Here's the thing. I tried real hard not to think about it but the harder I try, the more it gets me. I know that this is the most mature thing to do, to leave them alone and not feed their need for attention. However, unstoppable thoughts keep running through my axons and dendrites (ehem..biopsych..haha). I need to let this out just so I can quiet my mind. So, is it okay if I blab here for a while? hehe. Let me tell you exactly what happened:

Once upon a time, during a sunny but breezy Thursday afternoon, I was sitting in front of my inutil (coz it only functions when you plug it to an electric source) but very lovable laptop. I was busy submitting my online applications when I suddenly felt the urge to check my Facebook account. Adorable cartoon characters used  as profile pictures welcomed me in my news feed. I checked my notifications, there were a few comments here and there. And I also had one new message in my inbox. When I opened the very long message filled with links, I honestly thought it was a spam, like the messages random strangers send you selling fat burning protein shakes or something. haha. So I scrolled down and was about to click Delete when I saw a very familiar name mentioned in the message and BOOM!

There I saw it. My very first...HATE MAIL.

A stranger sent me a hate mail. Like seriously? You? Hate? Me? haha. I can't believe someone would actually feel that way towards me, considering the fact that I don't even know the person! Although, I admit, I've hated people in the past but knowing that someone hates you (even if it's a stranger) makes me feel uncomfortable! HAHA. Especially if you're someone like me who tries to maintain good vibes with others. But before I went gaga over it, I decided to read it first. Who knows? Maybe it was meant for someone else, like mis-sent text messages? And maybe it was just a coincidence that "his" name was mentioned. Right?

But HELL NO. It really was for me. hahaha. The first thing that came to mind was, "Wow, this is definitely something new!" I guess there's a first time for everything, eh?

I'd rather not share the exact contents of the message. I got shocked and upset at first but after reading it's entirety, I found it rather amusing...and honestly, it brought a smile to my face. Like this one - :D

It was evident that the sender, let's call her Ms. Erable, did a lot of research and she knew me very well- BASED ONLY ON WHAT SHE SAW ON FACEBOOK. Now, isn't that the best way to get to know and judge someone? BRAVO! HAHA.

Also, I was a bit flattered that someone would actually take the time to stalk me, look at my photos, read my comments, my posts, even ask a friend to do a favor and add me on Facebook just so she can stalk me! haha. Isn't that amazing? Going through all those effort just to secretly gain information about someone and create invalid judgments based on that alone? And wait wait wait, it doesn't end there, she actually went the extra mile and wrote me a VERY VERY LONG (I'm not exaggerating) message filled with links which served as her visual aids. VIVA!! hahaha.

Wow, I can't believe people go that far to express their hatred for someone. The farthest I've gone was writing a post in this blog (which I deleted afterwards. HE HE). It's quite ironic how my first entry was about me hating someone and now it's about someone hating me. Is this a typical case of what comes around, goes around a.k.a Karma by Alicia Keys? hahaha.

I didn't reply to the message, I'd rather not go down to that level. But I would just like to share my final words to whoever sent that message:

To my new found friend, Ms. Erable, I want to thank you for showing deep interest on what I do in my facebook acount, my blog, my life and that person I used to be involved with. I sincerely appreciate the effort you've put into researching all those information about him, but just so you know, I REALLY DON'T GIVE A DAMN. :)) You don't even know the real score between us. But then again, that is none of your business. Since you have been such a loyal follower of my life, let me share with you three little words that might help save your sanity: 
GET A LIFE. It's never too late! :)  

KThnxBye,

GY :)

Just 'Cause I'm Confused

 
I am a person standing in front of this street sign.

Currently Listening to: Crossroads - Bone Thugs n Harmony (just so I can feel the moment. HAHA)
 
CONFUSION. That's what the past few days have been filled with. Davao or Manila? This job or that job? HR position or any job as long as it can give me enough cash for shopping? Be a freelance writer for the meantime or just continue job hunting? Decisions, decisions. So much choices to make yet so little time and so little clues on what the right decisions are. I don't know if all fresh graduates go through this phase but I'm definitely trapped in it!! I seriously don't know what to do with my life!! HAHA. And that's something new to someone who's used to a busy schedule and a daily routine. My current occupation as a couch potato has been hard for me. Although there are upsides of being a bum, such as a stress-free working environment, unlimited access to food and drinks, comfortable workstation and the like, it gets a bit depressing at times, especially when you feel like a worthless...BUM.

 For now, I've applied online to all my dream employers. Northgate Arinso, San Miguel, IBM, etc. So far, P&G would have to be my number one deam job. I heard they've great benefits and compensation. Plus Ms. Delia (our department chair-slash-psyc mentor-slash thesis adviser), messaged me the other day, telling me the HR Manager of P&G is her former student and prefers USC graduates. I guess that's an advantage for me. But thinking about the competition against top Manila schools such as ADMU, DLSU, UP, it makes me worried if I'll actually land the job. Oh well, I'll just have to KEEP THE FAITH and work extra hard!! Nasa Diyos ang awa, nasa tao ang gawa! Yeah!

On another note, when I saw a video on Steve Jobs' speech at the graduation ceremony of Stanford University, the two words that came out of his mouth keep haunting me every time I click on a link that jobstreet sends me. He said:

"NEVER SETTLE".

...may it be in work or love. He states that you should always continue searching for what you truly love because that's the only way to find satisfaction. Never settle. Never settle. Two words that keep bugging me every now and then. How the hell will I know if this is what I truly love if I keep telling myself that there's something greater than this? Something that's really meant for me and will give me more satisfaction? Do you get my point?

This is the part where I realize why I've been so confused for the past few days. Eurekaaaaa! FRIGHT- that's the reason why. Now that I'm finally done with school and a fresh start in starting a career is right in front of me, I'm scared that I might make the wrong choice. What if I put so much effort in applying for a job and realize later on that it's not my calling? What if I end up being in a job that doesn't make me happy? Or worse, what if one of my bosses is a Dirty Old Man and will attempt to sexually harass me? (Okay, OA.) SO MANY QUESTIONS BUT THE ANSWERS ARE SO FEW, all I really know is I love youuuuuuuu  by Side A. hahaha. Corny. Courage, courage, courage. That's the only way to get out of here and MORE POSITIVE THOUGHTS! And to always remember THE SECRET- "The universe will conspire to make it happen if it's really meant for me".

Anyway, I've said so much already and I haven't even started on another entry that I wanna write. I guess I have to end here!!

KThnxBye.

GY :)